Not sure if this should be in the female fashion thread instead.

I grew up pretty deprived – without going into the specifics, let's just say I didn't even get clothes I needed in my size sometimes, my mom would buy clothes on sale for my sister and expect me to wear those too. My sister younger but 2 sizes bigger.

So when I started earning my own money, I went all out, easily spending 5 to 6k a month on shopping alone in my first two working years. I never had debt and always managed to save something, but obviously I could have saved alot more without the shopping.

I'd been trying to cut back significantly on shopping in the past 2 years (in my 4th year or so of working), but the amount I spent still always surprised me.

So in 4Q of last year, I decided to try and track my nett spend all my apparel and accessory purchases for 4 quarters. I also started selling things I didn't use.

I have one and a half more months to go before I finish the 4 quarters (beginning 4Q19 to end 3Q20) and my nett spend over that time is a much better $1200 to $1300. However this is also helped by the fact that I acquired and sold a few designer items during that period for a profit.

I have no problem setting a reasonable (though not perfect) budget for food, private transport, holidays etc in other areas of my life.

Spending on apparel and accessories though, and actually on beauty products too, are the areas of my I have emotional problems with, and so can't ever decide on "reasonable" – sometimes I think 10k is more than reasonable, sometimes I think it should just be 1k, etc etc

Ultimately, I'm just trying to find a way to determine a "reasonable" budget for myself – since everyone's definition of "reasonable" would really differ according to their circumstances and hobbies. I don't spend anything on hobbies, for example.

Also, I'm sick of having to sell / donate / chuck things that I don't even use, but at the same time I don't want to go cold turkey (childhood trauma) and leave room for an occasional luxury purchase or so.

The problem is, "occasional" happens like once or twice every month at minimum for me, even if I'm careful. The only way I control myself is literally by tracking everything, and it's so tiring.

I'm financially healthy and have a decent nest egg of sorts for my age, but it's also the opportunity cost of lost time and effort that I have to put managing and stressing about this, instead of using those resources to invest my money (mostly sitting in high interest accounts

submitted by /u/Colour_riot

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